3 Tools for Self-Reflection

Reflective thinking turns experience into insight.

-John C. Maxwell

Have you ever reached a turning point and felt unsure about what comes next? Maybe it’s finishing a big project, stepping into a new role, or realizing life has gotten so busy that you’ve lost sight of what matters most. These transitions can feel unsettling—but they also hold incredible potential.

The key is reflection. Pausing to ask the right questions doesn’t just help you process what’s behind you; it sharpens your focus for what’s ahead. Without reflection, you risk carrying old habits, unhelpful patterns, or missed opportunities into your next season. With it, you create space for clarity, alignment, and intentional action.

Using a reflection framework can help turn your next transition into a meaningful reflection opportunity. The reflection tools here can serve as either a starting point for inspiration or as a guide throughout the process:

1. Values Assessment

2. Start, Stop, & Continue

3. Appreciative Questions

1 - Values Assessment

Reflection becomes more intentional and strategic when we have our values in view. Values serve as a compass to help us assess our life decisions with greater clarity.

If you haven’t done a values assessment, consider completing this exercise from Brené Brown: Living into Our Values. Make sure to grab the free pdf download that includes a values sorting activity and a series of reflection questions.

Once you have clarified your values, turn to these questions in times of transition:

1. How did I live out my values during this [month / year / event]?

   Get specific here: name activities, events, accomplishments, and behaviors.

2. When, where, and why did I step out of alignment with my values?

   This is an important point to retrace your steps and identify your most common derailers.

3. Which of my values were most frequently in conflict?

   When we feel stuck in moving forward, identifying our most common values conflicts is a powerful first step in navigating the tensions.

4. Which goals, activities, or behaviors will help me to live more fully into my values?

   Decide which values-based goals, activities, & behaviors you want to add or increase.

2 - Start, Stop, & Continue

1. What do you want to start? What new thing will bring fresh energy, new perspective, and purposeful progress?

   • What new habit will help you live out your most important values?

   • Who do you need to add to your community of support?

   • What opportunity will help you to play to your strengths?

2. What do you want to stop? What old thing do you want to leave behind?

   • What mindset is limiting your potential?

   • What habit, behavior, or commitment is draining your time, energy, or resources?

3. What do you want to continue? What purposeful or productive thing do you want to keep doing?

   • What brings you the greatest energy?

   • What has been most effective or successful? How can you do more of that?

3 - Appreciative Reflection

Traditional reflection models often take a problem-solution approach and address how we can improve in specific areas. Appreciative inquiry (AI), established by David Cooperrider, is an alternative approach to exploring the best in a situation, organization, or community through intentional, positive questions. Cooperrider explains more about Appreciative Inquiry in this short video.

The Appreciative Inquiry 4-D model can be applied using four phases, including:

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1. Discovery: Exploring what is working well

2. Dream: Envisioning what could be

3. Design: Planning what should be

4. Deploy: Determining the path forward

The 4-D model is excellent for organization or team planning, but the principles can also apply to individual reflection or conversations. The questions below are a great starter list to ask for a year-end review, or to use as individual writing prompts.

Appreciative Reflection Questions for Year-End Review

1. When you were at your best this year, what did it look like?

2. What gave you the most energy or fulfillment?

3. Which of your accomplishments was a shining success this year? What made it successful?

4. What strengths did you use the most often?

5. What was the most amazing team experience you had? What made this experience so positive?

6. How have you grown or made progress this year? What contributed to that growth?

7. How can you keep building on the progress you’ve made?

8. If you could shape your role in the future to be the most fulfilling and successful, what would that look like?

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